I thought

Alone in my private thoughts, too upset I cant sleep. No tv, only music playing. Angry that I let it happen TWICE with the same BITCH. It hurts like hell. She said she was my friend, she told me she loved me but she keeps hurting me. What am I doing so fucking wrong? I want so bad not to care but I do. The tears just fall...and fall...and fall. She doesnt see anything wrong with it. I was ok, I was doing ok, not talking to, not seeing her YET she came back into my life bringing with her the all too familiar heartbreak that she caused the FIRST time. I didnt think I would catch her on MYSPACE twice...the first time YES..but was she that stupid? Dude I'm dying inside. I didnt ask for any of this. What do I do with all that I'm feeling right now? I wanna run so far away, I want to hide, to pack all my shit and just up and leave. To go so far away. I want to be better. I want to feel better. I want to smile instead of cry. I really cant take anymore.